Teaching Mindfulness To Children
An Interview with Amy Gardner
Amy Gardner, one of RIM’s Dharma Teachers, has taught yoga and mindfulness to students from kindergarten to high school for the last 14 years.
In 2009, she and a group of like-minded cohorts began teaching yoga and mindfulness to students in Milwaukee-area public schools. The group provided direct instruction to students, trained classroom teachers, facilitated parent groups, and provided staff in-service. Amy continues to teach mindfulness to students with the active participation of parents and school staff.
LoriLee: Hi Amy, thank you so much for talking with us today. Your journey of bringing mindfulness to kids in Milwaukee area schools is truly inspiring, and I believe many people would love to hear about your experiences.
Can you start by telling us a little about your background? What inspired you to become a meditation teacher for kids? Why do you feel called to do this?
Amy: Hmm. That's an interesting question to contemplate. Teaching was not a career I'd initially thought about or went to school for. It was never on my radar.
Right after I graduated from undergrad in college, I spent several months in India. I was overwhelmed by the world's trouble and the difficulty I saw and experienced. At 23 years of age, I was considering different ideas about what to do with my life. I had a 'save the world' kind of mentality. But soon, it became very clear to me that, oh my goodness, education was the path! I could be a part of investing in our kids' future - so I went into education. That was a dramatic shift in achieving how, why, and what I wanted to do with my life.
Early in my teaching career, I also began seeing what my yoga and meditation practice did for my life as a teacher and parent. As a more mature adult, the importance of sharing these practices with children became evident.
Once on that path, I began using movement as a vehicle for supporting kids and maintaining wellness and health in their bodies. We shared practices that encouraged paying attention to their bodies, noticing emotions, and recognizing how their emotions feel in their bodies. As I expanded my own meditation and mindfulness practice, I began sharing the practices in a more meaningful way. My collaborating colleagues and I began to see the need to help kids and teachers find some self-regulation and self-awareness tools. We developed a curriculum to respond to those needs.
LoriLee: Did you get pushback or resistance when you suggested offering this type of training to kids?
Amy: In the beginning, there wasn't much resistance. Some parents asked that their children refrain from participating in the programs we were offering. Some teachers and staff resisted for various reasons—but overall, the program was well accepted.
LoriLee: Our readers would be interested in this work's influence on your life.
Amy: The influences have been dramatic. So many influences come to mind, but the ones that made a profound impact are patience and letting go. Patience is helpful when dealing with behaviors and difficulties that children arrive with, and so is letting go of my expectations of how the practice with the children should look.
We worked diligently on a curriculum and revised it many, many, many times to make it relevant, personal, and adaptable to the current conditions and the needs of the students. When we walked into a classroom of kids or met with a group of teachers, we had a clearly defined set of goals and activities that we intended to share. But sometimes, following the plan just did not happen.
Sometimes, we walked into a room and found a wholly dysregulated environment. I learned how important it was to let go of my expectations and be patient—patient with myself and patient with the needs of an individual child or the teacher—so I could meet them with compassion in that moment. Patience and learning to let go of expectations were real shifting points in my practice.
I can remember several years into teaching, I was working with a group of teachers and expressed the following insight: "I'm not here to teach these practices. I'm here to share this practice. I'm here to provide an experience." That was a huge shift from teaching to sharing - using patience, letting go of expectations, meeting the moment, and broadening the experience for myself and the students.
I've learned to hold the planned curriculum more lightly, seeing that simply sitting down and doing a few breaths together often had more impact than completing all the skills I intended to teach or checking off all the boxes on the curriculum. It was a living practice. With time, I learned to show up, be prepared, and bring my formal meditation and mindful living practices to every classroom I walked into. Yes, there was a lot of different energy and effort to meet.
LoriLee: Could you give us a little scenario about a day in the life of Amy Gardner teaching mindfulness to a class?
Amy: Gosh, well, I'll speak about the formal curriculum we tried to keep somewhat consistent but often unfolded differently depending on the setting. There was a routine - walking into the space, checking in, noticing what was alive at the moment in myself and with the energy of the classroom. It's very similar to what we do in a drop-in here at RIM… a kind of settling-in.
We usually began with a breathing practice and then asked for feedback about how they had been using the tools and practices from previous classes. This little bit of sharing helped us understand the relevance of the practices: what was resonating with the kids and what was not working so well.
We always had some movement planned for the session. We found movement in the classrooms was really, really important - whether it was just with hands, the body, standing, or more gross motor movement. The curriculum was movement-based for the younger kids, less so as the students got older. But, there was always a practice, some guidance, and teaching related to awareness, self-regulation, understanding emotions, kindness, and compassion - the curriculum had an actual scaffolding and unfolding of all the practices. Students knew what to expect in each session.
That being said, sometimes I walked into a classroom, and none of that happened at all. Sometimes, I did something dramatically different because I could see that there was agitation in the group, and the planned curriculum wasn't what was needed. As you can imagine, a myriad of circumstances may have made it impractical to go through the curriculum, so I had to meet what was alive in the room.
Sometimes, it meant moving the desks, sitting in a circle, and sharing. Sometimes, it meant standing up and doing a lot of movement and just regulating the systems, shaking, and doing some vagus nerve balancing practices. I always had a mental basket of practices, activities, and games that I could pull out at a moment's notice.
Sometimes, the opposite energy was present. For example, when walking into a middle school classroom, with everyone seemingly sleeping with their heads on their desks; I would offer energizing movement and games.
LoriLee: So flexibility was the key?
Amy: Yes … flexibility.
LoriLee: What keeps bringing you back to the classroom week after week?
Amy: That's an interesting question, and it makes me emotional. I could say many things, but I see such a dire need for our young people to be seen, heard, and understood. Mindfulness is such a simple practice to bring kids together and meet each other with kindness and compassion. They learn the words and practices needed to bring these awareness practices into their everyday lives. They begin to trust their own wisdom and compassion. And that's how the world starts to change.
There are simple ways we can do this with kids that don't cost much money and don't take a lot of time. You don't need anything special to support our young people with these simple things that can make a dramatic difference in their lives.
And I see it work. I've seen it over the years, over and over and over again. Kids shift not only their behaviors but also their mindsets, their ideas about themselves, their care for themselves, and their willingness to be more intentional with their lives - how they treat themselves and others. And so, what brings me back is joy, great joy for that shift in their mindset and inspiration for a hopeful future.
Joy and inspiration repeatedly move me to share mindfulness practices and to share the dharma for the greater good of our world. It's also beneficial for me because I'm continually learning, growing, and sharing. Sharing these practices in meaningful ways is the practice.
It took me a while, but I learned that teaching mindfulness is not something I could just talk about. I had to show up in my own practice over and over again. It's been infinitely beneficial for me. So yeah, the kids bring me much joy, and I'm ever deepening my practice.
LoriLee: Speaking of joy, do you have any memorable quotes from the kids you work with that brightened your day, brought on the joy, and kept you returning to the classroom?
Amy: Well, I keep a little book with quotes from students and teachers. Some bring me great joy, while others are really eye-opening and gut-wrenching. They are all reminders of how transformational these simple practices can be.
I recall a quote from a little 5-year-old boy. It was the first time we were doing mindful breathing. We talked about stillness. We practiced alternating between motion and stillness. We did mindful breathing with some movement, using what we called flower hands, breathing while opening and closing our hands with the in and out breath. By the way, when you have thirty-plus five-year-olds mindfully breathing with you, it's pretty magical.
After mindful breathing, I asked the kids to open their eyes and let me know how they felt. I'll never forget seeing this little kid's face sitting in front of me. His eyes lit up full of surprise, and he said, "Miss Amy, I feel different." I think this little guy realized the felt sense of being still and quiet on purpose. And he could do it. At that moment, I thought, "Okay, these five-year-olds can get this stuff, too."
LoriLee: That's a "drop the mic moment."
Amy: I know it was, and if you could see his face, his eyes, and his surprise. It was really sweet.
On the other end of the spectrum, there were remarkable moments with high schoolers, which often occurred in really challenging environments.
I can feel it now as I am talking about it. There was a student who did not engage in class at all. He had his hood up and head on the desk most of the time. He never responded and never engaged in the practice. At the end of each term, we ask the students to fill out a little survey with questions like: Have you used the practice? Would you recommend it to others? Where have you found it helpful?
This seemingly non-engaged kid explained on the survey, which I won't quote here to protect his privacy, that he had an altercation in the bathroom at school. Instead of using violence to cope, he used mindful breathing instead of hurting another student. It was profound to see how he benefitted from the practice. I have so many similar quotes I could share!
I've learned that just showing up for these kids over and over again sometimes speaks more than the practices they learn. Those are the moments that keep me coming back.
LoriLee: These direct expressions from the kids are important. They paint a picture that no verbal description could do.
Amy: Yes, right. So many other experiences were game-changers for me.
For example, a parent came into the school to talk about her 7th-grade child who had anger issues. This child was working with the school and a therapist outside of school, and he wanted help, too. He was working hard but still struggling.
One of our lessons involved a bit about brain science, understanding the amygdala as the reactive part of the brain. When we feel certain emotions, the amygdala, the fight-or-flight part of our brain, gets activated. In that state, we're kind of disconnected from our prefrontal cortex. We sometimes call it the downstairs and upstairs brain, depending on the age of the kids we're talking to. We tell the kids that the amygdala is activated when we are highly emotional, and our decision-making and discerning part of the brain is somewhat offline.
This particular student, who was struggling with anger issues, came home and shared this lesson with his mother and said, "I'm so glad I learned about that. I'm so glad I know how my brain works. I used to think there was something wrong with me. Now I really understand that it's just anger happening in the moment."
LoriLee: That's everything!
Amy: Right? Seventh grade! That was pretty sweet. Kids could shift from thinking, "Something is wrong with me because I have anger." to "Now I know some practices to help me control it." The practices help the kids to see that they have tools to regulate their emotions and responses. They can choose.
LoriLee: Amy, thank you for sharing your remarkable story with our sangha. You bring so much to the RIM community, and learning about your important work with children is compelling.
LoriLee Villwock and Christine Jacobi edited and condensed this interview for clarity and length.